I think my two kids believe themselves to be child stars deserving of mile long riders stipulating the precise presentation of their dinners across their little plastic plates, the music playing in the car and even the layout of the cushions across the back of the couch.
They are nothing if not particular. Especially Fruit Bat, who is at the selective age of 4. He wants a say in everything, including, of course, what duds he will and will not put on his body.
Here are the ensembles he refuses to acknowledge:
1. Shirts with buttons. No button-downs. No rugbys. No henlies. No buttons. Period.
2. New finery. Whatever I buy him, even if I purchased it already used, must sit in the dresser drawer for two months before it is deemed worthy of wear.
3. Black t-shirts with Spider Man emblazoned across the chest. Okay, this is my preference.
4. Layering! No sweaters. No sweatshirts. No long sleeved shirts under a t-shirt.
5. Shorts and short-sleeved shirts. Until he has warmed up to the idea. This usually occurs in late August, when he can reasonably sport shorts for about three weeks before we have to readjust to the concept of full-length.
Fruit Bat can at least often, though illogically, explain his preferences. Whereas Kitty Cat’s fashion predilections are, as far as I can tell, completely arbitrary:
1. No dresses. This pains me greatly seeing as how I’m a girly girl and want to parade her around in adorable little frocks. Alas, she won’t let me.
2. Similarly, no tights and no legwarmers (which she calls legwarms. No fair! Have you seen the Babylegs?)
3. No cuffing of her shirt sleeves.
4. No t-shirts with "Princess" or "High Maintenance" emblazoned across the chest. Okay, this is my preference.
5. No hair accoutrements. If I attempt to brush her curly locks back into a quick ponytail, she will whip the rubberband to the floor in disgust.
Oddly, neither of them is at all concerned with wearing clothes that match.