Do not overpack. You will have to lug your suitcases full of sand toys, swimsuits and sunscreen to one agriculture inspection, one ticketing agent and then, finally, to baggage check. All while your three-year-old insists on being carried.
Do not assume your three-year-old will cooperate in any way, shape or form. Do not expect her to grasp the importance of proceeding cooperatively through Security.
Do not forget to empty your children’s Sigg water bottles before said Security. If you do forget and then plead with the TSA agent to let you dump the water, remember to bring your boarding pass and ID with you as you voluntarily surrender your position. Shoes would be good too. If you forget all those things, do not start crying while refiling yourself in the Security line barefoot and holding only those two, small water bottles. Tears will not soften the TSA agents.
When you stumble upon your second agriculture check, do not attempt to bring grape tomatoes on board the flight (reasoning that they are the only vegetable your five-year-old will eat). The tomatoes will be confiscated.
When you stumble upon your second agriculture check, do not attempt to bring carrots on board the flight (reasoning that they are the only vegetable your three-year-old will eat). The carrots may be confiscated.
Do not bother looking for signs to double check your gate. The power may very well be off, leaving the monitors black, and probably no one has thought to actually mark each individual gate.
Do not fry your body 3–4 days before decamping the islands. You will trail dead skin flakes throughout the entire airport.
Do not bicker with your husband. It makes everything worse.