So. My blog. My sweet little space on the internet where I try to weave small stories that are really more vignette than narrative. My blog.
It seems like it's morphed a little, has become less a place for parental anecdotes and more a brooding spot. Darker thoughts have found their way here. It seems it's not so much about springing up onto bright, sunny hilltops and dipping into shadowy valleys and then climbing out again, but more about residing in the fog that settles in the low areas.
I don't necessarily think this way. Not generally. Generally I consider myself a fairly chipper person, able to clearly see the good.
Like right now. I am damp from having spent the morning touring the Woodland Park Zoo's Humboldt penguin exhibit in hard rain. My notebook got wet and my pen stopped working. But I loved the learning. I loved constructing the story in my head as I walked around, taking peaks at hidden areas most people don't get to see.
And I am sipping a hot, soy latte and am warm and a sliver of a sun is peaking out.
And, though I feel as if I'm standing in the crosshairs of change and it is scary and exhilarating and hard and is occasionally doubling me over, I'm basically okay.
Confused, yes. But okay.
To prove it, here are some good things that have happened lately:
Kitty Cat and I yesterday afternoon. We sprawled across my bed and read books. She snuggled into the crook of my arm. When my voice gave out, she used her hands to push my face into a frown. Then she would grin. And I would have to smile too, which tossed her into a fit of her staccato laughter.
Fruit Bat at the Farmer's Market Sunday, with big eyes, taking in the colors and musicians and standing in line expectantly for a hot dog that is safe for him, even with all his allergies.
Love and books and snowy-peaked mountains and ice water and warm breezes and grungy photo ops and clean blue jeans and holding hands and heartfelt conversations.
When I think of these things then the sun, it is larger than a sliver.