Hung over

Lying on the couch...vaguely hung over but mostly happy at the moment. 

Not hung over, so much, from the drinks consumed last night (while on a quest to improve my marriage by going on regular dates with J.) Hung over, more accurately, on cake and frosting and gray skies and leafless branches.

Dehydrated by a child sick this past week, by too many festivities, by not enough time to put words to screen.

Out the window...two squirrels chase each other good naturedly up and down a tree...playing follow the leader more than engaging in some aggressive mating mission. The sky, slightly brighter now, with melon undertones.

I'm hoping we can go to the beach. That I can sit on the sand with a cup of tea and watch the kids poke through tide pools.

A little woozy from a boy and a girl over-stimulated, who release their stress by whining and snapping and, in the case of Kitty Cat, sobbing over an inside out sock.

I can sometimes picture Fruit Bat, already, as a teenager--sullen and barky and condescending (with occasional flashes of self-possession). Other times, he is all little boy with his dinosaurs and his planets and his sticker books.

Yesterday morning I was ready to run away...over the mountains, into the Puget Sound, to Portland, anywhere. Now, in my depleted but recovering state, I want to be here to see what everyone becomes. How my relationship with J. evolves, how Kitty Cat will someday simply reach her hand into her sock and pull it rightside out, how Fruit Bat will morph into a young man, how long those squirrels can twirl around the trunk of tree.

Comments

[M]

The richness of life...well told.

[kcinnova]

And this is what I wonder... will Tamara decide that the richness of her home life is worth staying for?

Many times I am tempted to get in the car and just drive away... but where would I go? My heart is at home with my family. (Although I admit, lately I have been homesick for Puget Sound, the Cascades, the Olympics, the knowledge that The Mountain is there even when I cannot see it.)

Date nights are good. Most of the time, our date nights consist of a 30 minute walk in the darkening neighborhood. Even the simplest date can be refreshing to a marriage.

[Leslie]

I am hungover from my trip to Cali--not literally--but as you speak of. The body and mind are depleted. So much fun and life has been experienced in such a short time. I got back in touch with who I WAS and who I AM. Then at the airport sat in the toilet stall weeping because I missed my kids so much that it hurt. Today I am sick and lying on the couch recovering....but my heart is wondering what the kids are and is ticking off the hours until I can get them from grandma. Such a rollercoaster, this life thing.