Half Assed Kitchen

Noodle soup for needy people

Okay folks, this soup is fabulous. It takes a bit more effort than dumping a can of broth into a sauce pan, but not a whole lot more. And it's soooo savory. The ginger, brown sugar and cilantro complement each other to a tee.

This recipe came from Nigella Lawson's Express cookbook. And it's brilliant. Should we stop raving now?

Here's what you need and how you do it

4-6 ounces Udon noodles (spaghetti would also work fine)

3 cups chicken or veggie broth

2 Tablespoons soy sauce

1 teaspoon brown sugar

1 star anise (and if you're like me, you're all star a-what? You can get it bulk in many grocery store spice sections. You can also skip it.)

1 teaspoon fresh ginger, minced

3/4 cup bean sprouts

3/4 cup sugar snap peas

3/4 cup shiitake (or crimini) mushrooms. Buy pre-sliced if you can.

1/2 cup bok choy whites (thinly sliced)

2 Tablespoons fresh cilantro

1 chicken breast, thinly sliced (can also use pork, beef or tofu), cooked

Cook noodles. When done, drain and split between two bowls.

Fill a saucepan with stock, soy sauce, sugar, star anise and ginger. Bring to a boil. Add the veggies and chicken. Remove star anise. Pour stock/veggie/chicken mixture over noodles. Sprinkle with cilantro.

Half Assed Holiday Apps--Asparagus in proscuitto

This holiday season at Half Assed Kitchen we're simplifying your party-hopping by providing you with six weeks of Half Assed Holiday Apps. From now until just before New Years, check back for the best appetizers you can whip up with almost no effort.

The first ridiculously easy hors d' oeuvre is Asparagus in Proscuitto (or ham). Really, it's such a cinch and so impressive. Even its colors are Christmassy.

Here's what you need and how you do it

1 lb. asparagus

1/2 lb. thinly sliced proscuitto or ham (I actually prefer ham, but the proscuitto is a little fancier)

1/2 lb. sliced provolone or cream cheese

1 lemon, juiced

Black pepper

Trim off tough ends of asparagus and steam for 5 minutes. Then toss with the juice of one lemon and black pepper, to taste.

Lay out slices of proscuitto (or ham). Layer each slice with one slice provolone or a smear of cream cheese. Place 1 or 2 spears of asparagus in the center and roll up.

Fingerlings with bacon

Image shot by  Andy Ciordia

Looking for a quick, stick-to-your-ribs sort of side dish? One that is elegant and hearty all at the same time?

Fingerlings with bacon is an easy crowd-pleaser.

Here's what you need and how you do it

1/2 lb. fingerling potatoes, sliced in half lengthwise

4 to 5 slices bacon

1 small onion, chopped

Salt

Pepper

Cook bacon in skillet. Once done, remove from pan and set aside.

Add onion and fingerlings to the lovely, bacony fat and cook until potatoes are fork tender, but not mushy.

Chop bacon into small bits and sprinkle over potatoes. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Chunky veggie salad

This salad is so OBVIOUS and so incredibly HALF ASSED, we almost can't believe we're presenting it to you as if it's at all innovative. Because it's not. But sometimes you just need a little reminder of what your options are, right?

And, strangely, we had never considered concocting a salad like this until our friend Kara introduced us.

Here's what you need and how you do it

A variety of vegetables, chopped

Suggestions include: broccoli, cauliflower, cucumber, carrots, red or yellow bell pepper, yellow squash

Salad dressing

Try this honey-mustard recipe:

1/4 cup olive oil

2 Tablespoons honey

2 Tablespoons dijon mustard

Dash of salt

Few grinds of black pepper

Or check out Brianna's Poppy Seed dressing, which we think is excellent.

Baked apples in brandy

We're on a real dessert kick lately. Pumpkin ice cream pie, chocolate fudge baby cakes and now baked apples. 

Though, unlike the other sweets, you could kinda sorta convince yourself the apples have some nutritional value. Being fruit and all. That and baked apples are supremely easy and made with ingredients you probably have on hand.

And nothing (NOTHING) makes your house smell better than apples simmering in brandy and brown sugar.

Effort Required: 1/4 assed

Here's what you need and how you do it

4 apples (whatever variety you prefer)

Canola oil

4 Tablespoons butter or margarine, room temperature

4 Tablespoons brown sugar

Several healthy splashes of brandy (or bourbon or whatever liquor you fancy. Amaretto?)

2 teaspoons cinnamon

1 teaspoon allspice

4 teaspoons jam (any flavor, though apricot, fig or ginger work well)

1/4 cup raisins (optional)

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.

Mix the butter, brown sugar, brandy, cinnamon, allspice, jam and raisins. Set aside.

Core the apples. A corer would really come in handy here, but we just did it with a sharp-pointed knife.

Pare a strip of skin around the middle of each apple (to keep them from bursting in the oven.)

Spray a small baking dish with canola oil and set apples inside. Fill apples with butter/brown sugar mixture. Drizzle remaining mixture around outside of apples.

Bake for 30 to 35 minutes, until apples are tender and brown sugar mixture is syrupy. Serve with vanilla ice cream or cheese.

Baby cakes with fudge frosting

 

A few weeks ago we purchased our first pair of mini cupcake pans. And you know what? We're never going back to big. The "baby cakes" are satisfying enough to fulfill your strongest cupcake craving, but the smaller size is much more reasonable, not to mention less damaging to your waistline.

We like to use boxed cake mixes. Because we find them perfectly acceptable. And we've even been known to buy canned frosting.

However.

When you're looking for a really special, really chocolately icing, this fudgy recipe from Global Gourmet is, by far, our favorite. Even we at Half Assed Kitchen know that sometimes an occasion calls for something fabulous.

Here's what you need and how you do it

1/4 pound (1 stick) unsalted butter or margarine, cut into 6 pieces

1/2 cup granulated sugar

1/2 cup half and half (or soy milk)

4 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped

4 ounces unsweetened chocolate, chopped

2 cups powdered sugar, sifted (or not)

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 teaspoons instant decaf coffee dissolved in 1 Tablespoon water (optional)

Put the butter, granulated sugar and half-and-half in a medium saucepan and heat over medium heat until the butter melts and the sugar dissolves, stirring occasionally. Increase the heat to medium-high and simmer the mixture for 1 minute, stirring constantly.

Small bubbles will form around the edge of the pan. Remove the saucepan from heat. Add the semisweet and unsweetened chocolate and stir the mixture until it's smooth and all of the chocolate is melted. Return the saucepan to low heat for 1 minute, if necessary, to melt the chocolate completely.

Pour the chocolate mixture into the large bowl of an electric mixer. Add the powdered sugar, vanilla and dissolved coffee and mix on low speed just to incorporate the powdered sugar. Press plastic wrap onto the surface of the mixture and refrigerate until it is cool to the touch, about 35 minutes. Stir occasionally to ensure the mixture cools throughout.

Beat the cooled chocolate mixture on medium-high for 1 minute, or until the frosting is creamy and lightens slightly in color. 

Start frosting your baby cakes!

Pumpkin ice cream pie

 

For years, since our oldest child was diagnosed with a severe egg allergy, we've been attempting to concoct egg-free pumpkin pies. But you know what, nothing can replicate the custardy texture that egg provides. So, this year we're giving up convention. We're making pumpkin ice cream pie. Because we're flexible like that.

We found the recipe over at Yahoo Shine and are champing at the bit to try it.

Not only does it look fantastic, but it's allegedly healthier than regular pumpkin pie.

Go here to check it out.

Skillet Spaghetti

This is another recipe from our grandparents' generation. We're not sure how it's different from the goulash we posted in July, except that it's all made in one pan and boasts 1/4 cup of Heinz 57 sauce. Which we'd never used until trying this dish. (And, high fructose corn syrup...mmm.)

Skillet Spaghetti (which uses no spaghetti at all, but a shorter, firmer pasta such as cavatappi) is a flavorful, filling dinner that's easy to whip up on a week night. Or, if you're lazy like us, any night.

Rating: Truly 1/2 assed (all in one skillet! Hooray!)

Here's what you need and how you do it

1 lb. lean ground beef or turkey (We prefer turkey that is not all Breast...which is the same way we like our men.)

1/2 cup onion, chopped

1-1/2 cups water

1 lb. canned tomatoes

1 cup tomato sauce (or just dump in extra tomatoes and skip this)

1/4 cup Heinz 57 sauce

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon sugar

Pepper, to taste

Pinches of parsley and oregano

1-1/2 cups uncooked pasta (Not spaghetti. We don't get it either. *Throws up hands* It's from the 50s.)

Brown the ground meat and onion. Drain.

Stir in remaining ingredients. Bring to a boil. Reduce to medium heat and simmer uncovered for 15 to 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Beets with gorgonzola

We are big fans of beets around here. We like them prepared just about any way. But tonight we outdid ourselves. And the best part? It was easy.

For this one, you don't have to LOVE beets, but you can't be repulsed by them either. The gorgonzola, red onion and olive oil do a lot. But they are, after all, still spooned over beets.

If you're game though, give this one a try. I can't imagine you'd be disappointed. The sweetness of the beets combined with the pungency of the cheese is mouth-wateringly delicious.

Here's what you need and how you do it

Pre-steamed beets (found in the refrigerated produce section, vacuum-packed. Canned would work too.)

2-3 Tablespoons gorgonzola or blue cheese

1/4 cup olive oil

1 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon sugar

1/2 teaspoon garlic

2 Tablespoons red onion, chopped

Pepper, to taste

Walnuts (optional)

(Fresh parsley would make a nice addition as well.)

Heat beets in microwave or on stovetop. Meanwhile, mix gorgonzola, olive oil, salt, sugar, garlic, red onion, pepper, and walnuts (if desired).

Drizzle over warm beets and serve.

Pulled pork sandwich

Who among us omnivores doesn't like a good pulled pork sandwich? Not only are they scrumptious, they're simple.

Pulled pork sandwiches are also a great way to use up a leftover tenderloin.

Here's what you need and how you do it

Pork butt or tenderloin

Mini baguettes or hamburger buns

Ingredients for Firecracker Barbeque Sauce:

1/4 cup chipotle peppers in adobo sauce (in the Mexican food aisle, comes in a small can)

1/3 cup finely chopped onion

3 cloves garlic, minced (or, better yet, buy the already minced kind)
1 cup ketchup
3 tablespoons white wine vinegar
3 tablespoons full-flavored molasses
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce

Cook pork in oven or on stovetop until a thermometer in thickest part of pork reads 160 degrees.

While pork is cooking, make barbeque sauce. Place peppers and adobo sauce in a blender or small food processor. Cover and blend until smooth. Or, simply dice very finely.

Lightly coat an unheated medium saucepan with nonstick cooking spray. Cook onion and garlic in saucepan until tender. Stir in chipotle pepper mixture, ketchup, vinegar, molasses, and Worcestershire sauce. Bring to boiling. Reduce heat and simmer, uncovered, about 10 minutes or until sauce is slightly thickened.

Shred pork and add to barbeque sauce. Serve warm on baguette or bun.