Half Assed Kitchen

Pork chops with mustard sauce and capers

This is an insanely simple dinner. The mustard sauce, shallot and capers really make a boring, old pork chop something special.

Rating: Truly 1/2 assed

Here's what you need and how you do it

2-4 pork chops (we used boneless)

Olive Oil

1 shallot, chopped

2 Tablespoons dijon mustard

1/3 cup cream, half-and-half or soy creamer

1 teaspoon fresh lemon juice

2 Tablespoons capers

Salt and pepper to taste

3 Tablespoons flour mixed with a little water

Pan fry pork chops in olive oil. In separate skillet, heat shallot in olive oil until softened. Add mustard, cream, capers, lemon juice, salt, pepper and flour mixture (enough so desired thickness is achieved). Cook until heated through.

Spoon sauce over pork chops. Consider serving with garlic mashed potatoes and a salad.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Crockpot Beef Burgundy

Whenever we get our morning act together enough to actually throw meat, vegetables and a few spices into the crockpot, we are supremely proud of ourselves. Ridiculously smug for the rest of the day. We have, for once, made our family's dinner top priority and instead of slapping some half-cooked fish filets and french fries on the table, we'll be serving a nutritious, hearty, savory meal.

Enter beef burgundy simmering away in our slow cooker, some boiled egg noodles, a side salad and we have a fabulous meal for lots of people (two to three meals for us).

Beef burgundy is essentially stew with mushrooms and lots of red wine splashed in. It's basic, flavorful and sticks to your ribs. We think our recipe is a nice balance of spice, salt, beef and cabernet sauvignon.

Rating: 3/4 assed (chopping)

Here's what you need and how you do it

1 pound lean stew beef

1 large onion, chopped

3 celery stalks, chopped

2 large carrots, chopped

1 14.5-ounce can diced tomatoes, with liquid

1/2 pound button mushrooms (or more)

1-1/2 cup red wine, plus 1/4 cup

1 teaspoon dried thyme

1 teaspoon dry mustard

2 Tablespoons worcestershire sauce

1/3 cup flour, or more depending on how thick you want it

1-2 teaspoons salt, to taste

Black pepper, to taste

1/2 pound egg noodles or other flat pasta

Layer onions, celery and carrots along bottom of slow cooker. Add beef. Sprinkle mushrooms over the top. Pour in 1-1/2 cup red wine, tomatoes, spices, worcestershire. Sprinkle with salt and pepper.

Cook on low for 8 hours or high for 4-5 hours. Can also be cooked in a dutch oven on stove for 1-2 hours.

Toward end of cooking cycle, whisk together 1/4 cup red wine with the flour. Pour into stew, stir well and let cook for about 10 minutes with lid removed.

Boil pasta according to package directions.

Serve beef burgundy over noodles.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Maple pork chops with apples and onions

We had a package of pork chops in our fridge and no plans for them. So we browsed around internet recipes a little, announced, "Screw it! We're just gonna throw stuff together" and then started tossing ingredients into a skillet.

What we ended up with was maple pork chops with apples and onions. And it turned out well. So well, in fact, we made it two nights in a row. The apples, onions and maple complemented each other nicely and made a bland pork chop taste a little like opera would if it had a flavor.

Rating: 1/2 assed (simple, but not ridiculously so)

Here's what you need and how you do it

2-4 pork chops (we used bone out)

1 medium onion, sliced

1 apple, sliced (Granny Smith or Braeburn, something a little sour, would work well)

1/4 teaspoon cinnamon

2 Tablespoons maple syrup

1/2 cup red wine

Olive oil

Salt and pepper to taste

Pinch red pepper flakes (to temper the sweetness of the maple syrup)

In a large skillet, heat olive oil. Add onions, apples and pork chops. Cook until each side of the chop is seared. Add remaining ingredients and continue to cook, covered, until all are heated through and pork chop is no longer pink inside.

The key is to not let one flavor overpower the others. If the maple is a little too pronounced, add more onion and some extra red pepper flakes. If the burn is too strong, add in a little more syrup (but not too much, or this will turn into breakfast).

Serve with roasted potatoes and green beans. Or whatever.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Chickpea patties with Mediterranean salad

We're not vegetarians anymore, but sometimes we still like a light, yet filling, meat-free dinner. We got this idea from Real Simple (where else?) and love the lower-fat twist on falafel. The chickpeas have a faux meaty texture and the yogurt-lemon dressing makes them sing.

Rating: Truly 1/2 assed (simple, but not ridiculously so)

Here's what you need and how you do it

2 15.5-ounce cans chickpeas (garbanzo beans), rinsed

1-2 eggs

1 cup fresh, flat-leaf parsley

2 cloves garlic, chopped

1/2 teaspoon ground cumin

Salt and pepper

4 Tablespoons all-purpose flour

4 Tablespoons olive oil, plus some for frying

1 cup low-fat yogurt (preferably greek)

6 Tablespoons fresh lemon juice

8 cups mixed greens

1 cup grape tomatoes

1/2 red onion, thinly sliced

Pita chips (optional)

In a food processor, pulse chickpeas, eggs, parsley, garlic, cumin, 2 Tablespoons olive oil and 1/2 teaspoon each salt and pepper. When coarsely chopped and the mixture comes together when gently squeezed. Form into 6 to 8 half-inch thick patties and coat with flour, tapping off excess.

Heat oil in nonstick skillet (very important that it be nonstick) over medium high heat. Cook the patties, turning carefully, until golden brown.

In a small bowl whisk yogurt, lemon juice, 2 Tablespoons olive oil and 1/4 teaspoon each salt and pepper. Divide the greens, tomatoes, onion and chickpea patties among plates. Drizzle with the dressing and serve with pita chips.

If the patties crumble a bit, just spread them out over the salad. The combination is delicious.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Taco Bowls

Taco bowls are a most ingenious and super simple dinner idea we ran across in Parenting magazine several years ago (and modified a little). Kids will generally eat these plainish and adults can gussy them up with avocado, lettuce, tomato, chilis, etc.

Rating: 1/4 assed. Absurdly easy.

Here's what you need and how you do it

12 6-inch flour tortillas

1 pound ground turkey or ground beef

Olive oil (for sautéing meat)

1 package taco seasoning mix (We like Simply Organics Southwest Taco)

16-ounce package shredded cheese

Avocados (optional)

Lettuce, shredded (optional)

Tomatoes, diced (optional)

Sour cream (optional)

Black olives, sliced (optional)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Trim about 1/2-inch around the edge of each tortilla. Push the tortillas into a non-stick muffin tin (we use the super large tins and do not trim the tortillas, but you can use regular tins to make more manageably-sized bowls).

Meanwhile, sauté ground meat in olive oil, breaking apart large chunks and stirring occasionally until meat is cooked through. Add taco seasoning mix and a 1/2 cup water, simmer for a few minutes more.

Fill each tortilla cup with meat and cheese and bake 10 to 12 minutes, or until cheese is melted and cups start to brown.

Serve with black beans with lime and cilantro.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Pork Bolognese

We've long been a fan of bolognese (pronounced bowl-on-YAzay). It's rich and thick and hearty and swoon-worthy. Only recently have we tried making it though, and even with having to chop the carrots, celery and onion very finely (that's one of the keys to bolognese), it's only one carrot, one celery stalk and one onion and it's really not that bad.

The hardest thing about this recipe is allowing enough time for it to simmer down. Start mid afternoon if you're cooking this for dinner. It'll make your house smell amazing and by 6 you'll have a large portion of fantastic pasta sauce.

We adapted this recipe from Martha Stewart's Everyday Food. And, hoo-boy, are we glad we did.

Rating: 3/4 assed (some chopping)

Here's what you need and how you do it

3 slices bacon, finely chopped (we used pre-cooked)

1 small onion, finely chopped

1 medium carrot, finely chopped

1 celery stalk, finely chopped

1-2 pounds ground pork (we used just one pound and it worked fine)

1/4 cup tomato paste

1 cup dry white wine

1-1/4 cups whole milk (we used Silk Soy Creamer, non-flavored)

1 28-ounce can tomato sauce or crushed tomatoes

1 cup low-sodium chicken broth

3 bay leaves

1 Tablespoon dry thyme

1 Tablespoon dry oregano

Salt and pepper, to taste

1 pound cooked penne

Grated parmesan

In large Dutch oven or heavy pot, cook bacon until fat is released. Add onion, carrot and celery; cook until soft. Add pork and cook, breaking up meat with a spoon, until browned. Add tomato paste and stir until pork is coated.

Add wine and milk; cook until reduced by half. Add tomato sauce, bay leaf, thyme, salt and pepper. Simmer, stirring occasionally, about 45 minutes.

Serve sauce over pasta, topped with parmesan.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Shrimp and feta pasta salad

We stumbled upon this tasty combination of ingredients while looking for something cool, yet protein-packed, to make for dinner. It is August, after all. Not exactly a time for split pea soup or chili.

Some of these ingredients can be swapped for things you may have on hand. But a few may require some grocery shopping. (We don't know about you, but generally there isn't a pound of shrimp waiting in our fridge--though we do have chicken, which is a possible substitute.)

If you can swing it, give this one a try. It's light and healthy, with a nice contrast between creamy feta, firm tomatoes and the snap of green onions.

Rating: Truly half-assed (simple, but not ridiculously so)

Here's what you need and how you do it

1 pound shrimp, cooked, de-veined, all crunchy bits removed

1/2 pound feta cheese (could also use mozzarella)

5-6 green onions, chopped

4 Tablespoons fresh basil, chopped (If you don't have basil, flat leaf parsley would be nice too)

2 roma tomatoes, chopped

1/2 to 3/4 pound pasta

Italian salad dressing or juice from half a lemon and 1/3 cup olive oil combined

1 teaspoon salt

Freshly ground black pepper

1 Tablespoon oregano

Boil pasta according to package directions. Combine shrimp, feta, green onions, basil, tomatoes, salt, pepper, oregano and Italian dressing. If you have time to let the mixture stand at room temperature for an hour or so before serving, the shrimp will soak up some of the herbs and oils.

Add pasta to shrimp mixture and toss to coat.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Spaghetti Frittata

Please welcome Kristy, of Sassy Molassy and Book Worm Food Blog as she describes how to make a luscious spaghetti frittata.

Years ago, in one of those standard old cookbooks—Betty Crocker or Good Housekeeping, I can’t remember which, I saw a recipe for a frittata made with leftover spaghetti. I thought it sounded….interesting, kind of strange, and although I never made one, the idea lingered in the recesses of my mind. Until yesterday. Who knew something that sounds so odd could be so delicious! 

This recipe makes a great breakfast/brunch for two adults after the kids have had their cereal and gone off to play. I’d eat it for dinner if I didn’t have so many people at my table.

This recipe is for using leftover, unsauced spaghetti, because that’s what I had, so if yours already has sauce of some kind, you can skip right to the part where you pour the eggs over the pasta.

Here's what you need and how you do it

1 tbsp butter or olive oil

2-3 cloves garlic, minced

1 14-ounce can diced tomatoes, lightly drained

Smidge of crushed red pepper

Salt and pepper to taste (I used sea salt)

6 eggs, beaten

Leftover pasta–about 6 ounces worth

1 Tablespoon chopped fresh basil, if you have it

Parmesan

Heat butter or oil in a large-but-not-deep-sided skillet. Add garlic and sauté about 30 seconds (never brown garlic). Add tomatoes with about half their juice, season with salt, pepper, and crushed red pepper. Simmer for about 5-8 minutes, stirring occasionally, until tomatoes have broken down some and juice is reduced. Add pasta and stir to coat. Give it a minute or two to heat through, then reduce heat to low and pour beaten eggs over. Quickly stir things around so you have a somewhat even distribution of egg and pasta. Sprinkle with parmesan and chopped basil, then just let it heat slowly so the eggs can cook without scorching.

When the eggs have mostly set, you have two options: flip or broil. I set a plate over the skillet, flipped the whole assembly over, returned the skillet to the flame, and slid the frittata back in, uncooked side down. Alternatively, if you have an overproof skillet, you can stick the whole thing under the broiler to finish cooking. Once both sides are done, flip it (if indeed you are flipping) back right-side-up. You will need to run a thin spatula around and underneath before doing this. 

Cut into wedges and serve!

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Ravioli with spinach and bacon

Another Real Simple recipe? you ask.

Well, yes. That's what happens when Real Simple is delivered to our house every month. We see the recipes. We drool a little. We buy the ingredients and cook them up.

We blog about them.

This is a tasty little number that takes about 20 minutes to pull together (and we really mean 20 minutes. None of the 10 minute meals that, in actuality, require an hour.).

We used Rising Moon's Butternut Squash ravioli (though you can use whatever variety you prefer) and the sweetness of the squash contrasted nicely with the tangy lemon and salty bacon.

If you buy pre-cooked bacon, which we highly recommend, the prep time goes that much faster.

Rating: Truly 1/2 assed (Simple, but not ridiculously so)

Here's what you need and how you do it

1 pound ravioli, fresh or frozen

6 slices bacon

2 Tablespoons olive oil

1 Tablespoon garlic (or 2 cloves, sliced)

5 to 6 cups fresh baby spinach

Salt and pepper

1 Tablespoon fresh lemon juice

Cook ravioli according to package directions.

Meanwhile, cook the bacon in a skillet until crisp. Cool and crumble (or use pre-cooked and microwave for 30 seconds then chop into small pieces).

Using the same skillet (wiped clean), heat olive oil over medium heat. Add garlic and cook until golden. Add spinach, salt and pepper. Cook until just wilted.

Stir bacon and lemon juice into the spinach. Mix with ravioli.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.

Cornish pasties

Image courtesy of Our Cornish Pasty Shop.

Pronounced with a short A, pasties originated in Cornwall, England. Despite their name, they are not the sexiest food in the world. But they are hearty. And tasty.

Pasties (not paaaasties, people), are meat pies that are also very popular in Northern Michigan, where Cornish ex-pats turned-copper-miners used to take them underground for meals.

The traditional recipe for pasties is good, but, in our opinion, a little dry.

In honor of our upcoming trip to our homeland of Michigan, we whipped up a batch, but added...(plug your ears you purists)... gravy.

This version we like a lot. A whole lot.

Rating: 3/4 assed (There is some chopping to do. Yuck.)

Here's what you need and how you do it

4 rounds of prepared pie crust (we buy the rolled, frozen kind)

1 pound ground beef or cubed steak

1 medium onion, chopped

1 medium carrot, chopped

1-2 cups potatoes (any kind), cubed

1/4 cup fresh flat-leaf parsley, chopped

1 teaspoon salt

Ground black pepper

Gravy:

Drippings from cooked meat

1 cup chicken broth

1/4 cup flour, whisked into a small amount of water or broth

1/2 teaspoon salt

Splash of white wine (?) (Which is not at all traditional, but sure adds something.)

In a large skillet, brown meat, onion and carrots. Pour off drippings into a separate sauce pan.

To the drippings, add broth, flour (mixed with water to keep it from getting lumpy), salt and wine (?). Heat until warm and thick.

Add potatoes, parsley, salt and pepper to meat in the skillet. Pour in gravy and stir until well mixed.

Spoon some meat mixture into one-half of each pie crust half circle, leaving a generous margin. Fold over and crimp edges. (You can use a fork for this, or just roll with your fingers.) Continue until each crust is filled and crimped.

Place pasties on cookie sheets and bake at 350 degrees for about a half hour.

For a printable version of this recipe, click here.